“grace growers”

quite often in life, it isn’t so much the hardships, but the people we hold close to our hearts or trust that hurt us deeply. i have a friend who uses the term “grace growers” for people like that — those who’ve hurt us, but those who give us an opportunity to extend grace and grow. i like that perspective. it gives me a chance to shift the way i look at difficult relationships and hurtful people. it helps me to turn my self-centred questioning of “why me?” to “how can i grow from this?”

over the years, i have had many “grace growers” in my life. more recently, i have had a trusted person hurt our family over a misunderstanding that could have been easily resolved over an honest conversation, except the other person thought “quitting” our relationship via text was the way to go. i asked the person,

“i’m sorry that there was a misunderstanding, but the misunderstanding happened on both sides… where’s the grace? grace can’t be something you only receive — it goes both ways.”

life isn’t easy. especially when it comes to hurt people and broken relationships. in this season of life (for me personally), it feels like the enemy is at prey, looking for an opportunity to use his tactics of deception and lies to steal and destroy relationships that would ultimately hurt me and my own children. and unfortunately, i sensed this was coming. i had sensed that this attack from the enemy was coming, but it still hurt. it hurt my family. maybe that’s why it’s a pain that is harder to let go — through this experience, my children have had to learn how sometimes people enter and leave our lives unexpectedly, sometimes people are willing to learn from experiences and grow and sometimes they just walk away, but life goes on…

truth is, we can easily get stuck in a dark hole of the blame game. instead of blaming others, i end up blaming myself or questioning how things could’ve played out differently. but in my sadness, i came across this trailer for a short film called, “The Shift”, which is a low budget film production but with an intriguing narrative. it got me replaying those scenes that were tormenting my heart with a different perspective. it wasn’t my fault like the other person was trying to make me believe. it wasn’t anyone’s fault. and it made sense why i had to shift my thinking and turn my heart to a place of healing. it was so clear. the enemy’s tactic was to turn my heart towards self pity, shame and guilt; a place of pain and darkness. but all i had to do in this moment was to turn to the One who was waiting for me to run into the arms of —to carry me through this storm with His perfect peace and His hope being my anchor.

so in the midst of the hurt and heartache, i have been running into the arms of God with a simple, yet what has felt like a heavy request:

“Dear God, i choose to forgive and let go, as i hand everything to You, what truth do You want me to know?”

and in my prayer, i heard that all-knowing comforting voice that stills my soul,

“you have My everything, My dear child…”

that is the beauty of letting go —like the leaves that fall in autumn, there is more beauty awaiting in the next season….🍁🍂

1 Peter‬ ‭5‬:‭10‬ ‭(TPT)

“And then, after your brief suffering, the God of all loving grace, who has called you to share in his eternal glory in Christ, will personally and powerfully restore you and make you stronger than ever. Yes, he will set you firmly in place and build you up.”
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